The purpose of life

Definitions, Estimations and Derivations
Purpose, tell us the creators of wikipedia, "in its most general sense is the anticipated aim which guides action." Do I have one; do you? And how is mine different from yours? We are all born, and we will all die... That is one purpose that every life has, that is one rule that every living thing must follow, a destiny that will be fulfilled.

On a timeline if birth and death were two dots then a life could be any form that joins those two points. What is different is the shape, size, colour and texture of that shape joining those two dots. Intersecting with possibly millions of other such forms. So by that rationale, the straighter the line, the more boring and purpose-less would one's existence be. All that everyone wants is to be happy, to be remembered. To have another line running parallel to theirs. What is important is to have a goal, and the will to pursue it. If you're brave enough, and patient enough, have just the right number of blown fuses, you just might make it.

The Pursuit of Purpose

But wait, let's back up a little. No one is born with a purpose, and if they are, then they are most certainly born unaware of such a thing. The only exceptions being Jesus Christ and all the avtaars Lord Raam, assuming they were in fact, born. So one must begin with the pursuit of a purpose. If you're lucky, you'll be provided with the tools required to achieve, or at least pursue, with some comfort, that reason for your existence; Enter Education; Schools, Colleges, Speciality Colleges, Super-speciality Colleges, Universities and what not.

Now that almost half of our life is over, and we're almost certainly convinced that life is all about career, a job, making-it-big and all, we're almost certainly convinced that the purpose of our lives is to earn money. Who gives a shit about that guy rotting in a pile of his own shit and piss down on the road, right?

"That's not my problem, God chose to punish him, god gave him an infectious rash, god amputated his limbs, god deformed his face, god left him here on earth to remind me of how lucky I am."
"Oh, and just between you and me, I don't believe in god. I just use him as and when required."

The Top Ten Purposes

1. Money
2. Money
3. Money
4. Fame
5. Money
6. Money
7. Money
8. A lil more Money
9. Just a lil more...
10. "There's just no end to what I can buy" more...

Let's see now, did I cover it all? I suppose I did. Who do I blame it on? My parents... they measure my success by how much money I earn. And they're not the only ones... It's not their fault really, cuz that's what their parents thought. The only difference... 50 years ago, a girl's success was linked to her husband's... And now, both prefer to maintain, and top-up their own bank accounts.

The Anti-theory

I regret to inform the readers who have been agreeing thus far, that the purpose of life is not to earn money, and your success will not be measured by how much damage your savings brought to the earth's crust, assuming you go the Scrooge McDuck way. You were born, and you will die, and you won't get to take a penny with you. It doesn't matter how pretty your presentations were, or how many of your clients loved you, or if you wrote the best programs on earth. Nobody give a f**k !

All you need, is to be remembered, and if you wanna be remembered for your money then stop wasting time reading this post and go earn some more of it. I want to be remembered for what a loving, caring person I was and how I touched lives by my kindness and selfless nature. Probably a little too much... considering the fact that I look more like an ogre who's out to eat, or at least kill everyone... But who cares, right? I probably don't want to go to villages in Africa or Afghanistan, heck why even leave my country, there's enough famine and misery here...

I just want to love someone with all my heart and if that person would love me back even half as much then I would've acheived the purpose of my life. I thought I had that... I was so close... But alas... that tale's for a different post...

So am I stupid if I want the purpose of my life to be something as trivial as making someone smile everyday? If I want to see her, and make happy all the time? Am I being stupid? It makes me happy to watch the person I love sleep with a peaceful smile on her face, wondering about what she's dreaming... I loved the millions of tiny little things she did that I found incredibly cute...

Sub-Purposes

What does one do when he acheives the goal of his life? Would I just sit on my ass and do nothing then? Of course not! With the wings that the discovery of this"love" gave me I would want it all, and I would go get it all ! A sub-purpose ! When you find something that matter, when you find someone who means the world to you, you do everything in your power to keep them around, to keep them happy, to keep them smiling, to fulfill all of their dreams... No? I guess not... But these sub-purposes are tiny goals that one yearns to achieve and to hang on to. The scariest thing then, would be, that after you've fixed a goal for your life, goal decides to pack it's bags and move away because she believes you're not ambitious enough... because you don't want anything more from life... cuz you don't want to make it big, whatever the fuck that means....

I suppose you can't blame anyone but yourself... So it's probably better to just be chasing the money train instead of anything else... What do I know... I'm just a scared lil 27 year old man who hasn't a clue about what's coming next... Who knows what other twists and turns more would lead me to my last dot... All I wanted was to be happy, instead of being rich or at least trying to be all the time...

...

If, to get what I want, or what I believe I need, I have to intensely change into virtually another person, would I still want it or need it once I am that person ? Would I cherish and enjoy it just as much ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

A CRRI for Help

In Delhi, and perhaps the rest of India, the brains that design our roads and awesome fly overs and underpasses work for an organization called CRRI, or Central Road Research institute. These guys sit inside a room filled with loads of information about current and perhaps predicted traffic volume etc etc.. Well, these poor chaps have been doing a fine job so far. The only problem is that there is such a huge delay between the design phase and the implementation phase that whatever has just been built is rendered useless by the "growth" that occurred in that time.

Anyways, who am I to tell them how to do their job. I'm sure they already have their bosses to hate and bitch about. What I have for them is an idea. Wait, an awesome idea, something supreme, something so supremely awesome that it'll solve half of the problems of this world, not just our city or country! And if think about it for a long enough period of time, you'll realize that this idea that I'm about enlighten you with, might solve the world's hunger problems, bring about world peace and even bring an end to Bush's reign !

Yes, now that I have adequately established that this idea is somewhat significant and will kinda revolutionize the way we think and the way live our lives, it is time for the great unveiling of the awesomely supreme idea.... So brace yourself for a brave new world... A world that shall change forever with the dawn of "The Green-Honker ".

Okay, so get up, relax, open your eyes, breathe normally... I know that was a lot to take, but "What happened, happened for a reason and could not have happened any other way." It had to be done. And now, before sheer excitement causes you pass out again, allow me to explain the intricate workings of this supremely awesome and awesomely supreme device, The Green-Honker...

This highly complex unit comes in a small box with an in-built audio amplification system and a speaker system. It also contains a micro-processor controlled audio-signal emulation devices. Ok, so enough about what's inside the box.. What does it do, you ask ? Well, The Green-Honker, is a highly intelligent device that would be installed alongside every traffic light. Its function is to emulate the incessant honking that occurs everytime the signal turns green. But that's not all. This device doesn't even wait for the signal to turn green ! It is actually capable of detecting the levels of anxiety and impatience in the people waiting (if any). In fact, that's where it draws its power from !! The more impatient the people are, the louder the Green-Honker honks.

Is this an awesome device or what ?! Think of the amount of power saved in terms of electricity and fuel! It also ensures a longer life for your vehicle's horn and guarantees to reduce incidents of carpal tunnel syndrome and other honking-related injuries. In a test conducted at some of the busiest crossing in Delhi, it was observed that the green-honker was able to reduce honking-related injuries by over 65% on the first day alone! OPDs and Emergency Rooms of hospitals in its vicinity reported a significant reduction in the volume of incoming patients.

A reduction in the number of law suits, the amount of electricity saved, the amount of fuel saved, a steep reduction in all related injuries, bigger smiles on people's faces... How were we ever doing without this device? Kinda makes you wonder why you didn't think of this device before I did, doesn't it? Well it's too late now ! I hope the fine gentlemen at CRRI will consider my supremely awesomely great idea and implement it at the earliest....

The question marks of Love...

What is it about Love? What is it ? What is love? Dare I answer that? Dare I tread down that path, where thousands, perhaps millions have lost their lives trying? A simple question, yet no answer... But I'm not going to write about what love is... I know what it is... But I can't tell you, no one can.. So what am I going to write about ? I don't know. Something about love, I guess..

Is everything truly fair in love and war? Okay, to hell with war, leave that to the Bush's of the world. But is everything fair in love? Must I do everything in my power to ensure that my love lasts? Will everything really be ok in the end? Where does it end? Does it end? I am torn between being in love and being a nice person. I thought it meant the same thing. But turns out it's not!

Is it ok to love someone if you're existence means ripping apart their family? Is love worth fighting? Were the Trojan's stupid ? Or was the Trojan War the only war in the world that actually made sense? In India, love is probably as bad as the 4-lettered f-word. Is there just one kind of love between a man and a woman? Is it a measurable quantity? If it is what is the unit of measurement ? Was I better off when I was not in love? Well, I guess the answer to this last question is a firm No. Love has worked wonders on me. It has definitely made be a better man... But will it desert me when I'll need it the most ?

Enough with the questions... Let's move on.

"Lucky"

Consider the following:

1. Fall down a well; Break your arms, and legs and a couple of ribs, and throw in a couple of deep gashes, cuts and bruises. Come out Alive...
2. Hit a wall at 200 kmph in your brand car sports car, your face gets "FUBAR-ed", your limbs are rendered useless, and you develop a speech impediment; Oh and of course, your car is totaled... Yet, somehow, you come out alive...
3. A not-so-major back accident, a slight weight problem, a bad posture, too much of sitting in front of your computer, an ailment that defies your age, and therefore worsens it by going undetected for years... An inter-vertebral disc decides to go out for a stroll and slam into the nerves of near and around your spinal column... You're in bed, helpless for 2 months, you'll never ride a bike again, never play any sports, never run, or jog.. But you come out alive and there's no nerve damage, no motor or sensory loss in your limbs...

A series of unfortunate events ? Lemony Snickets ? Not really. Not all of that happened to me, just the slip disc, but I'm not cribbing about that today... I'm here to discuss about something far more important... Something that's common between the three above mentioned events... In the end, people will say the same thing... "You're so lucky. You came out alive." Whoa wait a minute, lets step back here for a minute and review this, shall we? After all those horrific accidents, and being rendered useless for the rest of your earthly existence, is surviving considered lucky?

Some people are overly optimistic. They've will reach up the ass of the biggest, darkest, most fierce looking cloud and pull out the silver-lining! Or some even walk around with a bottle of spare silver paint... My advice to such people... STAY AWAY FROM ME ! You piss me off, all of you. If one event in my life changes everything, takes away everything that I love and am passionate about then who the f*** are you to say that I'm still lucky to be "alive"! I'd rather be dead! Actually, I'd prefer that you were dead!

Being lucky is the most subjective thing ever, and I don't like being told how lucky I am! You're most welcome to tell me how unlucky I am and what a mess I am in and what a shit-hole my life has become. But if you call me lucky then that's the last time you'll use your tongue! Sure, in the conventional sense I'm lucky than a beggar on the street, or the guy who brings me the newspaper every morning, or many other people... But must you rub it in?

There are things I have and then there are things that I need and/or want... And between the two (possessions and desires) is where luck breeds. In simple mathematical terms, the distance between possessions and desires is indirectly proportional to the coefficient of luck. More the distance, less luckier you are, and vice-versa. However, another factor that has to be considered is faith. Faith is Ray Ban of the stupid. On the inside you're still the same narrow-minded, priestly son-of-a-bitch that you always have been and shall continue to be, and on the outside, your also that same person. The only thing that has changed is your perception of who you have become, and worse, what you think you can accomplish, mainly by helping others.

So I have no problem with another person believing in whatever s/he wants, but, and I've said this before, why must you take it out on me? Due to my lack of faith I perceive my coefficient of luck to be, let's say 'x'. A man of faith would perceive it to be 10x. Once again, you're pissing me off !!!

Arghhh! This is going no where. To be continued... If I'm lucky ;)

Balls, Goals and Gods

So finally, years after its inception, I decided to foray into the blog-sphere... Why? Neither do I know and nor do I care. Perhaps I have exhausted all my "take-it-out-on-me" coupons. Perhaps I want to be heard, perhaps I need someone to listen to me, or maybe I'm hoping that my non-existential god-almighty will reach out from the heavens and shall deliver me the salvation and peace of mind that I have been craving for, for so long....

In my brief, so called existence among you people I have realized that every happens for a reason, however, most of the times we just don't like the reason. All the mistakes that I have made, all the "sins" that I have committed, all the pain that I have brought to others, has come back to me. Some people believe in god because they're afraid of the devil, some because they need someone to thank, and then there are people like me, who believe in his divine existence, for the soul purpose that we can hate him.

I didn't have the balls to admit that everything that is happening to me is because of all the stupid things that I have done. I didn't have the balls to own up my mistakes. A few days back an angel came down from heaven and she showed me that it was all my fault. I was so obsessed with finding others to blame (mostly god) that I had completely ignored the one and only culprit of my situation... Me...

So now that I have no one left to blame but myself, I don't need god anymore? Perhaps... At least that's one thing god and I have in common... We're both useless to one another.